Siblings of children with special needs.

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It is a well-known fact that Autism affects the whole family not just the child with special needs. Siblings play a very important role in the life of the child with special needs It affects them in a myriad of ways . They will be their longer in their brother or sister's life long after we are gone.

We all know having a child with autism takes a lot from families. The first thing which happens is as parents we feel responsible to help our kids that we dedicate countless hours to help them and in turn are not able to spend as much time with our typical kids. I am personally guilty of it as well as now somewhere I feel I missed out making a connection with my older son. Even though he is grown up now and understands why I was not able to devote more time to him I do realize somewhere deep down he has developed resentment towards me. please don't get me wrong our older son loves his brother a lot but it is natural for him to feel that way.

The other common thread which worries all parents of special needs kids is what will happen to our kids when we pass away and deep down after us we feel our typical kids are the only people who will care for their siblings like us. This puts a lot of pressure on them. I know it is wrong for us to expect it from them as they will have their own lives. If they willingly take up this big responsibility it is a blessing.

Our typical kids mature well before their age and miss out on playing with their siblings unlike other kids and feel it is their responsibility to care and protect their sibling. These children might develop some emotional issues as they grow up.

Today our older son is on the verge of going to the university. He has grown into a fine young man who loves his brother very much. I feel guilty sometimes when I realize time just flew by and I missed out on spending some good quality time with him as I was busy helping Aarian. I know I cannot reverse the time now but hope in the near future when Aaron steps foot in adulthood he understands that I love him as much I love my other son. They both are equal to me its just autism took a lot from our family and at one time our lives revolved around it.

Today both my kids are growing up with one getting ready to step into university. They say things improve with time and after a long time now I feel our family life is returning to normal. It no longer revolves around autism like it used too.

I would like to encourage other parents reading this post who have kids with disabilities please make sure you spend some quality time with your typical kids as well and built that connection so they don't feel left out. Try to appreciate them for all they do for their sibling. Hopefully this will help in giving some normalcy to our life.

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